Carnal Embrace

Glory holes may have been a punchline in high school, but in college they’re the real deal. I don’t see why people obsess over graffiti and grout puns—what about the myth of restroom sexual deviancy?

Glory holes are usually found in rest stops, sex shops and yes, college campus restrooms. They tend to be at the end of the row of stalls, farthest from the entrance. Drilled, poked out or cut, the holes are more than a peeper’s delight. Initially, glory holes were designed for gay sex, coming from the necessity to be discreet in a traditionally homophobic society. Now, glory holes are more novelty than necessity, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. Glory holes are easier to use for oral sex, as penetration can force some awkward positions. As for protocol, one Web site claims that the receiver initiates the act by sticking his finger through the hole and beckoning the other to come through. Others are under the impression that you just thrust your penis over to your neighbor. Frankly, I don’t think most people will react kindly to an uninvited member.
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Christine, my close freshman friend was recently sexually assaulted. How can I help her heal and cope with the situation? How do you suggest I (or we) best approach, punish or deal with her assaulter?

—A survivor and friend

I respect your concern for your friend, and I wish I could have had that support when I was raped. Coming to college, rape was the one thing I feared above all. I didn’t want to be overtaken, to lose power over myself or, most especially, to become another statistic. It’s been two years now, and I still don’t talk about it. Your e-mail, however, made me realize it’s important to acknowledge and talk about the event in order to regain control.

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If you couldn’t find a lover to test out condoms with last week, you can go hands-solo this week with the perfect vibrating toy. This club isn’t women only—vibration can be added to almost any sort of masturbation, regardless of your sex or sexual orientation.

Forget what science told you: Bullet vibrators are the building blocks of life. It’s best to get a simple bullet vibe (and lots of extra watch batteries) and then work your way up from there. Good Vibrations sells the Magic Touch Bullet Mini, a small, sleek, bullet-shaped vibrating toy, for $12. From here, you can add masturbation sleeves, rings, strap-ons and dildos more easily than you can customize your Scion.

For some toys, you can slip in a bullet vibe at the end for extra sensation. Women can party with Rock Chick, which is 4.5 inches long and a little over 1 inch wide for $66. Rude Boy is built more for prostate and perineum stimulation and is slightly longer at 5 inches. Unfortunately, you have to shell out more for that—it’s $79 for him.
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Condoms with a serious, long-term partner are a serious business. Having sex with a rogue condom is like voting for Ralph Nader when you really meant Al Gore. It really messes things up.

Regardless of your partner situation and regardless of your sex, you should find your favorite condom to optimize your safer sex experience. Some men like to masturbate with them, some sex toys need the protection and any multi-partner sexual activity needs protection to prevent sharing sexually transmitted infections. Certainly that’s enough motivation to stroll down to Good Vibrations on San Pablo Avenue or access Condomania.com online to find the largest, cheapest supply of condoms.

And now, here’s your ultimate shopping guide. Whatever you need, I’ve got the glove that fits for you (as long as you’re not O.J.). I’ve got stats from Condomania, a huge online supplier of­—you guessed it­—condoms. The numbers I’m about to spew at you are all averages, plus or minus some small degree of error.
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