January 24, 2007

Not-So-Shocking News

He had his finger up my ass. Actually, I wasn’t quite sure where it was. I hadn’t been expecting it. Wait, yes, that was indeed his finger. And that was definitely my ass.

Let me backtrack a bit. There was more to it than the rectal massage. I couldn’t believe it, but someone was seriously using the shocker on me. You know, “two in the pink and one in the stink”? Yeah, that one.

I wasn’t happy about it. I should have registered some sort of complaint, but what’s a polite bed-partner to do? It didn’t really call for a protest on Sproul Plaza. Perhaps a letter?

“Dear sir, I regret to inform you that your application into my anus has been rejected. Kindly remove your little-most finger from that area at the earliest possible moment. Best wishes, Christine.”
(more…)

3 Comments »

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  1. I get the feeling that this one is more of a personal complaint than an advice article. ::Laughs a little:: Still entertaining. And I’ll definitely be careful in the future. Keep ‘em coming.

    Comment by John — January 24, 2007 @ 6:30 pm

  2. I am not a finger butt fan. well at least not having a finger in my butt. I want to be asked permission. Most of all I don’t want to say no and then have the finger that’s been up my rectal quarters dragged around my pretty pink. I’m down with giving a little massage..

    Comment by i don't need a cork! — February 5, 2007 @ 10:26 pm

  3. One of the joys of this life of ours, one of the overwhelming pleasures, indeed one of the things that makes life worthwhile is that we’re not all the same.
    I know the science of where a ladies erogenous zones are. I know that there are none up that particular alleyway.
    But I also know, from blissful experience, that there are women out there that take enormous pleasure from that move that so shocked you.
    Maybe it’s mental. But it evinces a very physical response. My lover has been known to enhance her masturbation with the addition of a set of anal beads and she is a devotee of the finer points of self-induced orgasm who woudn’t waste her time and effort on something that didn’t improve the eperience.
    as someone once said (although in a different context) and
    in a very french accent

    vive la difference

    Comment by freddy — February 6, 2007 @ 5:15 am

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