Carnal Embrace

So there I was, my guy friend lying face-down across my legs and my hands touching and rubbing and squeezing his ass. And spanking. How could I forget spanking?

I was spanking my friend. Not friend with benefits. Not fuck-buddy. A plain ol’ platonic friend. The boring type.

He was enjoying it, too. He moaned with each spank, especially for the stinging ones, and asked for it harder. I was hoping his ass would get sore and then it’d be my turn. Baby’s been a bad, bad girl. Very naughty. And she, too, needs a spanking.

And since when did guys like — let alone beg for — spanking? Okay, so I’m forgetting some homoerotic fraternity practices, but that’s beside the point. I’m just pissed I didn’t get spanked.

Both ladies and gents (though not all) like to get spanked, and society tends to stereotype the spanked females and males. Wikipedia wants to link men who enjoy being spanked to homosexuality. I don’t understand why all things ass-related have to be gay. Straight people like the ass, too.

A man who likes to be spanked is not any less of a man for allowing himself to be sexually dominated. It’s actually a turn-on to have your guy in your hands…literally. Taking control and walloping him (before he then, ahem, wallops you) adds a balance of domination to the bedroom. Admit it, it gets boring when you’re always the one getting pounded in the poon. Plus you need to let a little aggression out — all in the name of sex and fun.

Women who like to be spanked also get pigeonholed, but they don’t have to defend their sexuality in the process. They are always depicted in some sort of incestuous May-December coupling, being punished by tough-love Daddy. I’m sorry, I leave my daddy issues outside the bed. I like spanking ‘cause it feels good.

We forget the power of the human touch, the warmth of another’s palms and fingers, the intimacy we share by feeling through our partner’s body. The hand is a powerful sexual instrument, and I’m not just talking about hand jobs and fingering.

The crack of a spank, too, is arousing. The sound is crisp, playing staccato notes over the long, slow moan. It punctuates, it pierces, and, oh, it pains.

The sting of an erotic spank is not the same as that of a child’s punishment. In an erotic setting, pregnant with desire and aroused expectations, spanking mingles pain and pleasure. What once sent us into tears now delivers us moans and excitement. It is our lover, not our disciplinarian. The ass — butt cheeks and all — is an erogenous zone, waiting, wanting to be touched. Spanking offers a rush of touch with packaged force, a frenzied dance for your nerves. And we all like dancing, don’t we?

Spanking doesn’t have to involve just the hands either. Paddles, straps, whips, and crops are all part of a dominatrix’s well-stocked closet. Don’t be afraid to use them if you desire to be adventurous. If you want to mix a little sensuality and surprise into your next spank-session, get your hands on a feather snapper.

It won’t be as intense as your own hand (or a more serious toy), but it’s good for the curious. Plus it’s so deceptively innocent, it warms the heart of every secret sadist. I must admit, though, it’s the hands for me: part of the excitement of spanking is the ability to give a good whack with your own bare hand.

Okay, so maybe spanking can fit into the sissy-boy or naughty-girl stereotypes. When you take such control of your partner and have them so vulnerable (ass up, in the air, and their face hidden from your view), the feeling of domination comes to play. With men, being dominated — especially by a female — seems to detract from the normative aggressiveness of male heterosexuals. I’m not saying this is what truly happens, but it is indeed a societal perception. On the other hand, women are pushed into an increased passivity, regressing in age (and not sexuality). They become bad “little girls.” Why can’t grown-up men and women simply be spanked?

Berkeley’s full of students with room for civil disobedience in their hearts (or at least it was) — but how about sexual disobedience? I say mix it up, cause some confusion. Even if you’re the bottom, take the initiative and spank your partners…while they’re on top. Spank casually, spank often. Just don’t spank it alone. Hands, my dear friend, are for sharing.