Carnal Embrace

Everyone has a perineum, but few know how to get there (or that they might have been there before). This Latin lover lives below the border of your waistband. It’s a forgotten homebody between two louder party animals, residing between whatever you’re packing and your pooper. For women this means the perineum lies between the vaginal opening and the anus. On men the perineum stretches from the edge of the scrotum and the bulb of the penis to the anus.

Yes, I mean the taint, as it is known colloquially, among other names. Gooch. No man’s land. Assneck.

Your perineum, however, is more than just another weird place on your body with a funny name. It is an erogenous zone, often uncharted and unexplored with typical vanilla lovers.

But I say no man’s land no more!

Touch it. Trust me, it’ll feel good. Do it, right now. I know you’re reading this in class, but honestly if the professor doesn’t see you tinkering around on your laptop or doesn’t care, you might as well stick your hand down your pants.

In fact, the best way to receive pleasure from your perineum is to test it out yourself. Feel it, stroke it, slather on some lube. See what you like. Do you like to push against it? Rub your finger along it? Massage it with a knuckle?

Once you know what you like, then you can guide your partner in exploring your nether region, too. Make sure you communicate with each other so that both of you are comfortable. Some people get nervous or uneasy about ass-related areas. Just tell your partner ‘taint your ass, and if he or she really loves you, there should be no hesitation. What do you have to do to get a good p-job around here?!

For men, pressure against the perineum can externally stimulate the prostate, a gland essential to making semen and often compared to the female G-spot. Press against the perineum with the force applied up and toward the anus to target the prostrate. Or, go the other direction and direct your touch toward the scrotum (but as always, be gentle around this delicate area). The perineum for men sits atop a few scrotal nerves, so you can stimulate both his front and back junk by exploring his middle.

Playing with your man’s perineum is an excellent way to move to anal play, if you so desire. Adding perineal play (with your fingers or your tongue) to oral sex may also be just the right touch to bring your man over the edge and have him begging for more.

For women, it’s harder to stimulate that special spot with just perineal play. However, if one of you ladies out there can manipulate your perineum to stimulate your G-spot, I congratulate you. And would like to watch.

Nonetheless, a nice p-job on your female partner would be a welcome twist to fingering her. Just place an extra knuckle or thumb (depending on your hand position) against the perineum and test out a few motions: knead it, trace circles, or rub out the alphabet. Likewise, a little tongue on P (besides the usual P) action while you’re going down on her wouldn’t be a half-bad idea either.

Don’t forget the toys either. Both the boys and girls can test out a little vibration on the perineum. If you want to introduce toys to your middle passage, I would recommend a small vibrator, like the bullet, which is the perfect size to stimulate just enough of the area. If you’re not so sure about a vibrator, try working in a little warming liquid, which will respond to your touch and turn the heat up. You can find it in many forms – gel, lotion, lube, cream – and at any sex shop and most drugstores.

Another plus to your little p-spot? ‘Taint gender-specific, so for those of you out there who do not identify as either male or female: you can have a perineum and play with it, too. Perinea for everybody!

The perineum is not as pleasure-potent as say the G-spot or prostate gland is, but its vicinity to both can make studying anatomy very enjoyable. Give it a little loving and it may just love you back.